Tuesday, September 23, 2014

A year? Seriously?!

Forget Carmen Santiago - where in the world have I been?!

Well, I've started graduate school, revved up my photography business, fallen in love a few times. and am still raising my three delicious Brownies.  Lots to tell.  Soon...

Sunday, July 21, 2013

She Lives!

By "she", I mean "me".  Or maybe "I".  Either way, I haven't fallen off the face of the earth.

Life has just been an interesting array of surprises and destiny lately.  "Sweet Brownies Photography" has taken off in directions I never expected.  And I'm going back to school.  For my Masters.  When the heck did I decide to add "student" to my resume?  Oh well, I'm going with it.  The flow feels right.  The time is now.

God has been so faithful and to see His plans for my life come to fruition is both humbling and gratifying.

Who knew?

Down deep, I think I always did.

Sunday, March 31, 2013

Paying it Forward

A few months ago I read a quote on Facebook to the effect that when you are in God's will and obeying Him through seemingly insurmountable circumstances, people will want to help you.  And they won't know why.  People will want to be kind to you.  And they won't know why. 

The British television show, "Downton Abbey", is one of the few programs I've found myself getting into lately. Joining the bandwagon late, I relied on Netflix for Season One.   After anxiously waiting on The List at the public library for nearly two months for Season Two, I requested the third - a wait that would be at least as long as the first.

A Mommy Friend I met on a parenting forum several years ago, but whom I've never met in person asked me if I had gotten a hold of the third season.  She, too, a huge fan.  Then to my utter surprise, she offered to let me borrow her copy.  To say I was elated is the understatement.  I graciously gave her my address and eagerly awaited the DVDs.

The following week, a box arrived addressed to me.  But it was from Amazon.  And I hadn't ordered anything from Amazon.  I ripped open the box and out spilled "Downton Abbey" Season Three...and Season Two...and Season One.  Brand. New.  I retrieved the packing slip which said, "_____ has sent you a gift".  The personal message from her was that I would need not return the DVDs.  They were all mine to keep.

I could barely see through my tears to type her an immediate "Thank You".  She wrote back that she had had every intention of just mailing me her copy of the third season to borrow, but something told her to buy me the whole set instead.

What did I say to that?  How did I respond?  Well, I cried. A lot.  This Act of Kindness touched me in a way and at a time in my life that restored my faith.  That let me know that my trials and tribulations have not gone unnoticed.  That tides turn.  Seasons change (literally) and God is good (all the time).  At that moment I realized the power of Paying it Forward.

And that's exactly what I decided to do.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Monday, February 18, 2013

Picture This

Picture this:

A middle-aged woman who recently pushed the "reset button" on her Life decides to take her love of Photography to the next level.

Picture this:

She scours the Internet and libraries for all things Photography.  She begins to teach herself the basics. She starts joining forums frequented by novices and professionals alike. She carries her DSLR camera around with her every where and takes photographs at every opportunity.  She invests in editing software and explores the endless possibilities.

Picture this:

She starts to develop her own style.  She notices she is truly happy behind the camera.  She notices when the clouds diffuse the light just right.  When backlighting transforms her subjects into angels on earth.  When she nails exposure in camera.  When she captures a natural, relaxed gesture from a subject that exposes heart and soul. 

Picture this:

People start to take notice.  They ask her to take pictures - and she doesn't say no. She asks people if she can photograph them. 

Picture This

She starts a Blog dedicated to her love of Photography. 


Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Moment in Time

We've all had Bad Days. 

But have you ever had a day you wanted to freeze in time because it seemed too good to be true?  A day when all the stars seem to align in your favor and your heart threatens too burst with gratitude?

I had a day like that last week.  I remember purposefully looking up to the sky and thanking God in that very moment.  For that day and for His hand in everything leading up to That Day.  I looked down at my son as we were playing in the backyard and was all of a sudden humbled by how blessed I am. 

All days aren't going to be Red Letter. But knowing that everyday has the potential to be that way gives me that extra fuel to motor through what ever I have to confront around the next corner.

Saturday, February 9, 2013


I'm going to throw out my raincoat
Mmm, I hope it's all right
Gonna go find me a rainbow
And hang it up in the sky
Blues pass me by

This song was playing in Safeway.  One time.  Months ago.  I didn't know the title.  I didn't know who sang it.  But I knew I couldn't get the melody out of my head.  Eventually, I tracked it on down on iTunes after Googling fragments of the lyrics.

Not only does she sound like an angel, but the words make me happy.

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Open Letter to My Happily Married Friends

*I didn't write this letter.  But change the name and a few details, and I easily could have.

Dear Happily Married Friends,

You may remember me as a twosome. I was married for a long time. I had a husband. And then we decided to separate and divorce. Now I'm just Becky, on her own.

First and foremost, let me say that I am truly glad that you're married and in love, that you're working on fixing that leaky roof and redecorating the master bath. I think that sounds like more fun than wrestling Cameron Diaz in a vat of baked beans. Honestly.

But I'm going to have to talk to you about something I've wanted to say since my husband and I split in July.

Divorce, unlike this flu I can't seem to shake, is not contagious.

I know, I know -- it may seem like I'm dying of divorce. But I can assure you I'm not. I'm okay; I'm going to survive. I know this because I'm a nurse and I watch a lot of hospital drama shows -- which, when you combine the two, pretty much makes me a doctor.

I've seen the way you look at me now and it's not in an "Oh, that darn Becky and her foolish hijinks!" way any longer. I see the pity and the sadness and I understand it. Getting a divorce sucks. I'm not sugarcoating it and I hope like hell it won't happen to you and your loving partner.

But I see something else underneath it, too. I know it's there because I used to feel it when my own friends struggled with divorce: it's a sort of smugness, and I'm here, talking to you through keystrokes on my computer, to tell you that you should probably rethink that attitude. I wish I had.

See, I didn't get all dressed up in the foofy white dress, march down the aisle, and say my vows in front of everyone I knew with the intention that I would one day be Becky, As Herself, again. Like anyone who gets married, I knew divorce wasn't an option. At least, I told myself it wasn't an option because we were going to make it, dammit!

Things don't always work out as planned, my dear married friends. Even with every intention of staying married, my husband and I grew apart. There's no one person, no catalyst, no particular reason for it, and most importantly, there's no one at fault. Just like it takes two to get married (in most states), it takes two to destroy one.

No, no, don't back away from the computer horrified. I'm not trying to tell you that this will be the Ghosts of Divorce Future for you, not at all. You'll probably be just fine, happy as clams under your new roof and redone master bath. It'll be beautiful and rosy, just like you two.

But in the event that it doesn't (no, not trying to be a fearmonger, just trying to be honest about this and level with you), maybe you can remember the words I typed on a blank computer screen and remember that if it happens, if you do get divorced, it's not the end of your world. Nor are you contagious.

It's just the start of a new life. And while those of us who have been or are going through a divorce don't forget where we've come from, we also know that we'll live. It's a hard road, my dear friends, and it's full of bumps and pot holes and things that scare you damn near outta your skin, but I promise you one thing: it won't kill you.

There is life after divorce. I promise.

Love You,

Becky, As Herself

Reposted from "Aunt Becky"

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Monday, January 21, 2013

From MLK to BHO to my SON

With all the pageantry it deserved, today's Inauguration of Barack Obama to his second term as President of the United States of America did not disappoint.  And on the Martin Luther King, Jr., Holiday, no less. 
Black Americans shouldn't be the only ones proud on this day. 
ALL Americans should be.

Wednesday, January 16, 2013