I don't know how single Special Needs parents do it!
I don't know how Special Needs parents who work outside of the home do it!
~ posted by two Facebook Friends last week
I just finished cleaning up an epic toxic accident. Putting Isaiah on the potty and leaving him while I checked on dinner didn't turn out as stress-free as I had hoped. Because when he was ready to get up, he got up. Just because he was ready to get up didn't necessarily mean he was finished. So I spent a good part of my evening scrubbing tiles. Walls. Zaiah.
So when people ask me if I "work", excuse me if I scoff. I know what they want to know. If I am gainfully employed outside of the home. But I still like to make them squirm. "Work, you say? Where do I begin..."
Dinner still had to be completed and served. The laundry refused to transfer itself from the the washer to the dryer. Dishes had to be washed. Homework had to be accounted for. Of course, the Girls have responsibilities which makes me grateful that they are older now.
Especially now that I am considering a career outside of the home. My life is moving into a New Season. As God opens doors, I know the strength, faith, and courage He has been cultivating in me all along is coming to fruition.
How do single parents of Special Needs kids work outside of the house?
I have no idea. But if it is the Lord's plan for my life - I'll soon find out.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Mama Said There'd Be Days Like This
Quiet Saturdays are our new "in thing". Nothing on The Calendar. No obligations. No showers necessary. All I ask is that the kids brush their teeth.
What matters is that my kids and I are spending quality time together. Our weekdays are filled. The three of them attending three different schools on three different schedules. Mix in Zay's various therapies, girls' homework, doctors' appointments, counseling sessions, etc...it's easy to see why we become Pajama-Clad Waffle Eaters a couple of Saturdays a month.
The kids have been back in school for well over a month now. Pulling Savannah out of public school last year is proving to be the best thing we could have done. Thank God for my mother. We weren't sure how Savannah would do with a full-day schedule. It would include Lunchtime. Which would mean crowds, noise, and eating in front of other people. With her Asperger's, that creates a nightmare trifecta. The day she hopped in the van and announced she had talked during lunch was the day my doubts melted away. She recently brought home her Progress Report - all "Excellent". The staff is so nurturing. And she is thriving.
Isaiah continues to push the boundaries of how much one can love a little boy. To hear people in our circle express their affection for him is beyond heart-warming. It's affirming. Makes me feel like I am not alone in caring for him. Few are immune to his big, toothy smile and loving disposition. The stubborn boy who, when faced with a task he'd rather not perform, will go completely and utterly boneless. As frustrating as it is (an act we've dubbed The Boneless Chicken), it is a testament to the will of a boy who has no words, but more than enough charm, wit, and personality to control the parts of His World he discovered he can. His communication for the past 6 months has been remarkable. He is making choices. He can express his discontent. He can bring me a banana for me to peel for him. And one day I was standing at the bathroom sink the and he teetered up behind me with a 6-pack of applesauce he wanted opened. When he wants a bath (one of FAVORITE things), he pushes me into the bathroom and shoves me to the side of the tub. He's taller and stronger, but more tolerant of new things. We found out from his teacher at Open House last week that he is staying in his chair and participates (read: cooperates) with the lesson.
Also wowing me this year? Mariah. She started a new school and is happier than she has been in almost two years. She is making good grades and new friends. She has expressed an interest in joining Chorus at school. I had no idea she could sing. That was until I heard her in her room one day singing along to a Godzilla video. Not only was she sweetly in tune, but she was singing IN JAPANESE. How did I get so preoccupied with the Special Needs Duo that I missed that The Typical One could sing ~ in a foreign language, no doubt?!
So I dedicate this Quiet Saturday to my Middle Child with a Heart of Gold.
Dōmo arigatō, Miss Roboto
What matters is that my kids and I are spending quality time together. Our weekdays are filled. The three of them attending three different schools on three different schedules. Mix in Zay's various therapies, girls' homework, doctors' appointments, counseling sessions, etc...it's easy to see why we become Pajama-Clad Waffle Eaters a couple of Saturdays a month.
The kids have been back in school for well over a month now. Pulling Savannah out of public school last year is proving to be the best thing we could have done. Thank God for my mother. We weren't sure how Savannah would do with a full-day schedule. It would include Lunchtime. Which would mean crowds, noise, and eating in front of other people. With her Asperger's, that creates a nightmare trifecta. The day she hopped in the van and announced she had talked during lunch was the day my doubts melted away. She recently brought home her Progress Report - all "Excellent". The staff is so nurturing. And she is thriving.
Isaiah continues to push the boundaries of how much one can love a little boy. To hear people in our circle express their affection for him is beyond heart-warming. It's affirming. Makes me feel like I am not alone in caring for him. Few are immune to his big, toothy smile and loving disposition. The stubborn boy who, when faced with a task he'd rather not perform, will go completely and utterly boneless. As frustrating as it is (an act we've dubbed The Boneless Chicken), it is a testament to the will of a boy who has no words, but more than enough charm, wit, and personality to control the parts of His World he discovered he can. His communication for the past 6 months has been remarkable. He is making choices. He can express his discontent. He can bring me a banana for me to peel for him. And one day I was standing at the bathroom sink the and he teetered up behind me with a 6-pack of applesauce he wanted opened. When he wants a bath (one of FAVORITE things), he pushes me into the bathroom and shoves me to the side of the tub. He's taller and stronger, but more tolerant of new things. We found out from his teacher at Open House last week that he is staying in his chair and participates (read: cooperates) with the lesson.
Also wowing me this year? Mariah. She started a new school and is happier than she has been in almost two years. She is making good grades and new friends. She has expressed an interest in joining Chorus at school. I had no idea she could sing. That was until I heard her in her room one day singing along to a Godzilla video. Not only was she sweetly in tune, but she was singing IN JAPANESE. How did I get so preoccupied with the Special Needs Duo that I missed that The Typical One could sing ~ in a foreign language, no doubt?!
So I dedicate this Quiet Saturday to my Middle Child with a Heart of Gold.
Dōmo arigatō, Miss Roboto
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Spreading my Wings
I captured this picture earlier this week near Arlington National Cemetery.
"Just when the caterpillar thought her world was ending, she became a butterfly."
"Just when the caterpillar thought her world was ending, she became a butterfly."
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Pray Day
I wasn't living in the United States on September 11, 2001. J was stationed overseas and we were all enjoying the first of what would be two, 3-year assignments in Germany.
But I was fewer than 13 miles away from the Pentagon on that crisp, bright, not-quite-autumn morning.
At the end of August 2001, the girls and I had flown into Maryland. The plan was to stay with my mom through the beginning of October so I could attend the wedding of a good friend. Little did I know it would be closer to Thanksgiving before I would ever make it back to Europe.
On That Morning, I had awakened before the girls. My mother and brother had already left for work and I took advantage of the quiet to catch up on my e-mails. The phone rang. It was my grandmother. She asked if I had the TV on, which I didn't. As I was fumbling around to find the remote, I thought I heard her say "They blew up the World Trade Center." - which made no sense to me. But right there on Channel 7 was the unbelievable. Both towers billowing smoke. Holding the phone and unable to speak, I stayed on the phone until the South Tower collapsed. Then I sank to my knees and began to weep. The last word I heard my Grandmother say before we hung up: "Pray."
A lot can happen in 10 years. I have moved back to The States ~ twice. Lost several Loved Ones (including my beloved Grandnannie). Had a son. Run the course of my marriage. Started over. And still I pray.
Because I remember That Day. When we all stood as one. United in fear. In shock. In awe. When all we could do was pray.
Remembering the heroes and victims of September 11, 2001 and their families. Remembering the service members who gave the Ultimate Sacrifice and their families. Remembering those who continue to serve and the families who continue to sacrifice.
But I was fewer than 13 miles away from the Pentagon on that crisp, bright, not-quite-autumn morning.
At the end of August 2001, the girls and I had flown into Maryland. The plan was to stay with my mom through the beginning of October so I could attend the wedding of a good friend. Little did I know it would be closer to Thanksgiving before I would ever make it back to Europe.
On That Morning, I had awakened before the girls. My mother and brother had already left for work and I took advantage of the quiet to catch up on my e-mails. The phone rang. It was my grandmother. She asked if I had the TV on, which I didn't. As I was fumbling around to find the remote, I thought I heard her say "They blew up the World Trade Center." - which made no sense to me. But right there on Channel 7 was the unbelievable. Both towers billowing smoke. Holding the phone and unable to speak, I stayed on the phone until the South Tower collapsed. Then I sank to my knees and began to weep. The last word I heard my Grandmother say before we hung up: "Pray."
A lot can happen in 10 years. I have moved back to The States ~ twice. Lost several Loved Ones (including my beloved Grandnannie). Had a son. Run the course of my marriage. Started over. And still I pray.
Because I remember That Day. When we all stood as one. United in fear. In shock. In awe. When all we could do was pray.
Remembering the heroes and victims of September 11, 2001 and their families. Remembering the service members who gave the Ultimate Sacrifice and their families. Remembering those who continue to serve and the families who continue to sacrifice.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Hand Wash Only
They say things happen in threes. Apparently, I am well on my way.
The a/c fan in my van quit last week. Mercifully, the worst of the summer heat seems to be over. This week, the latch on my washing machine busted. It fills with no problem, but won't agitate or drain without assistance. I have to stick my hand up under the lid and connect the circuit. So safe around sloshing water. Not to mention I almost lost a finger in the Spin Cycle.
Channeling my inner "Mama"-Gyver, I was able to manufacture a temporary fix with a Tide bottle cap. Then it was time to break out the big guns - Play-Doh and a sponge hair roller. There was no way I was going to let that machine beat me. Although, I felt like I was doing all the work. Kind of gives a whole new meaning to the term "wash by hand".
Guess I'd be an awful pioneer, too.
The a/c fan in my van quit last week. Mercifully, the worst of the summer heat seems to be over. This week, the latch on my washing machine busted. It fills with no problem, but won't agitate or drain without assistance. I have to stick my hand up under the lid and connect the circuit. So safe around sloshing water. Not to mention I almost lost a finger in the Spin Cycle.
Channeling my inner "Mama"-Gyver, I was able to manufacture a temporary fix with a Tide bottle cap. Then it was time to break out the big guns - Play-Doh and a sponge hair roller. There was no way I was going to let that machine beat me. Although, I felt like I was doing all the work. Kind of gives a whole new meaning to the term "wash by hand".
Guess I'd be an awful pioneer, too.
Monday, September 5, 2011
Face. Time.
Savannah
This is the face that welcomed me into The Motherhood 14 years ago. A face that has been inspiring me ever since. I thank God for blessing me with such an inspirational soul. I love you, Birthday Girl.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Queue the Locust
If they sold "I Survived Acts of God Week" T-shirts, I'd probably buy one. No sooner had Mechagodzilla stopped bobbling from the Earthquake - it was time to batten down the hatches for Hurricane Irene. We lost power overnight, but the kids and I channeled our inner pioneers and stuck it out (but Mariah would have been an awful pioneer). The basement didn't flood, thank God, and we only lost a few tree limbs and branches.
My mom maintained power throughout, so we were able to go over and juice up the electronics. There is just something about being back home with your Mama that brings a sense of security like none other - no matter how old you are. Just ask the kids how much I seemed to enjoy my 2-hour nap. Ooh and the home cooked meal. Almost makes me wish for an Act of God every week.
My mom maintained power throughout, so we were able to go over and juice up the electronics. There is just something about being back home with your Mama that brings a sense of security like none other - no matter how old you are. Just ask the kids how much I seemed to enjoy my 2-hour nap. Ooh and the home cooked meal. Almost makes me wish for an Act of God every week.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Quaking in my Espadrilles
By most accounts, the Great East Coast Quake of 2011 wasn't a source of widespread devastation. It was considered a moderate and nearly unprecedented quake for this area according to the experts and a huge inconvenience for the locals. This is pretty much the extent of our damage.
Mechagodzilla is obviously more awesome than Regular Godzilla. But it wasn't all bad. I'm totally convinced the quake cured my garbage disposal. After a week of malfunctioning, it mysteriously began to work again after the quake.
A lot of the damage was emotional. I was sitting by a set of second-story windows waiting for Isaiah's therapy session to conclude. When the shaking started, I thought it was a central a/c unit about to blow. But the shaking grew more intense and the rumbling grew louder. I looked out of the window expecting to see a truck, a train, a plane...something. But nothing. It was a gorgeous, sunny day.
I rode out the quake petrified. Wanting to run, but not being able to move. In a flash,I thought about death. The office building was shaking and swaying in such an unfamiliar way that I knew it couldn't be anything good. I did not want to die - maybe it was the shock - but there was a peace surrounding me. I just wanted my kids to be OK.
No cell phone calls could go out immediately afterward, but I found out from my sister in Arizona via Facebook that my mom and Savannah were shaken, but fine. And my mom is apparently in the wrong professional. She should have pursued a career in body guarding. Or in the NFL. She didn't realize what was happening, but she knew she had to protect her granddaughter. So naturally, she tackled her. Mariah had been evacuated from her school and came home upset and concerned about possible aftershocks. We are still a bit unsettled over yesterday's events, so I was relieved they cancelled school today.
The earthquake gave me a crash course and what I know for sure is:
Earthquakes can fix things around the house
I am not truly afraid to die
My mother has a future with the Washington Redskins
Mechagodzilla is obviously more awesome than Regular Godzilla. But it wasn't all bad. I'm totally convinced the quake cured my garbage disposal. After a week of malfunctioning, it mysteriously began to work again after the quake.
A lot of the damage was emotional. I was sitting by a set of second-story windows waiting for Isaiah's therapy session to conclude. When the shaking started, I thought it was a central a/c unit about to blow. But the shaking grew more intense and the rumbling grew louder. I looked out of the window expecting to see a truck, a train, a plane...something. But nothing. It was a gorgeous, sunny day.
I rode out the quake petrified. Wanting to run, but not being able to move. In a flash,I thought about death. The office building was shaking and swaying in such an unfamiliar way that I knew it couldn't be anything good. I did not want to die - maybe it was the shock - but there was a peace surrounding me. I just wanted my kids to be OK.
No cell phone calls could go out immediately afterward, but I found out from my sister in Arizona via Facebook that my mom and Savannah were shaken, but fine. And my mom is apparently in the wrong professional. She should have pursued a career in body guarding. Or in the NFL. She didn't realize what was happening, but she knew she had to protect her granddaughter. So naturally, she tackled her. Mariah had been evacuated from her school and came home upset and concerned about possible aftershocks. We are still a bit unsettled over yesterday's events, so I was relieved they cancelled school today.
The earthquake gave me a crash course and what I know for sure is:
Earthquakes can fix things around the house
I am not truly afraid to die
My mother has a future with the Washington Redskins
Friday, August 19, 2011
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Leggo my Eggo. Seriously.
When people hear the term "comfort food", they automatically think potatoes, mac & cheese...typical carbs. Somehow, around the 24-pack-a-week mark, frozen waffles went from lovely, occasional breakfast fare to my drug of choice.
What can I say? They are perfect. Warm, light, and toasty. Crispy and tender all at once. Their sole purpose is to bring me happiness. Oh ~ and poundage. My clothes have been shrinking ever since I arrived at Waffletopia. But that's OK. The view from Celeryville is overrated anyway.
What can I say? They are perfect. Warm, light, and toasty. Crispy and tender all at once. Their sole purpose is to bring me happiness. Oh ~ and poundage. My clothes have been shrinking ever since I arrived at Waffletopia. But that's OK. The view from Celeryville is overrated anyway.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Be Cuz of Faith
Here I am on First Cousins' Weekend with my cousin, Michele ~ Master of Library Science. Thanks to her amazing accomplishments, she and her family have taken a huge leap of faith. Uprooting their lives and relocating, we are now not only emotionally close, but physically as well. God is good.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
The Tortoise in My Hair
One unnerving thing about living in a metropolitan area is the nonstop pace. Everyone is always on the go and quickly. Not exactly ideal conditions for a turtle attempting to cross a street.
But last Wednesday was one turtle's Lucky Day. That was the day that I happened to be driving down said street and noticed what I initially thought was a dead leaf resting between the bright orange parallel lines.
I've seen squashed turtles before. There was a big one at the end of my driveway just last month. I couldn't do anything to save him, but I was sure I could do something for that brown leaf that - upon further investigation - turned out to be a strong-willed (if not GPS-challenged) baby Diamondback Terrapin.
Instead of relocating him right away, we decided to take him home. We created a makeshift terrarium and an acceptable Baby Turtle diet. After his initial reluctance to eat (chalk it up to shell shock - sorry!), I was as delighted as a first time mom to see his Turtle Turds in the box the next morning. And by then he even had a name: "Crush". Partial Disney character; partial his lack of being so.
He has since been adopted by my brother and his family and renamed "Horatio", which is, quite honestly, easier to remember and much more suitable to that innocent, wise-looking face of his. My nieces are excited about their newest addition (joining his Beta sibling). I'm just excited I'm not any closer to ending up on an Animal Planet hoarding special.
But last Wednesday was one turtle's Lucky Day. That was the day that I happened to be driving down said street and noticed what I initially thought was a dead leaf resting between the bright orange parallel lines.
I've seen squashed turtles before. There was a big one at the end of my driveway just last month. I couldn't do anything to save him, but I was sure I could do something for that brown leaf that - upon further investigation - turned out to be a strong-willed (if not GPS-challenged) baby Diamondback Terrapin.
Instead of relocating him right away, we decided to take him home. We created a makeshift terrarium and an acceptable Baby Turtle diet. After his initial reluctance to eat (chalk it up to shell shock - sorry!), I was as delighted as a first time mom to see his Turtle Turds in the box the next morning. And by then he even had a name: "Crush". Partial Disney character; partial his lack of being so.
He has since been adopted by my brother and his family and renamed "Horatio", which is, quite honestly, easier to remember and much more suitable to that innocent, wise-looking face of his. My nieces are excited about their newest addition (joining his Beta sibling). I'm just excited I'm not any closer to ending up on an Animal Planet hoarding special.
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