Too Blessed to be Distressed

There's a scene in the original "Shrek" movie after he frees Princess Fiona and they are confronted in the forest by the king's henchmen. But instead of getting kidnapped, Fiona proceeds to kick their butts - as Shrek and Donkey look on in amazement.

I can appreciate that scene. Too often females are portrayed as helpless, weak, and poor decision makers (who runs from a killer in high heels?!)

There have been times in my life when I have wanted to be delivered from an unpleasant or even dangerous situation. Sometimes I want a Hero. But more often than not - I want to find my own way out. To see if I have the level head and courage to make good decisions. Even if it's the decision that I am in over my head. Like last weekend when my van battery died while on an outing with the kids.

When I realized I had drained the battery, I sat. Sat and thought. That's all I could do. J was out of town. And I really didn't want to feel like he had to save me, anyway. Then I remembered my Auto Membership. They could get me jump-started in no time. It wasn't like I was admitting I was in distress. Just ill-equipped to handle that particular situation. Make no mistake: I didn't need to be "rescued".

It was just by sheer coincidence that the company they sent out had the logo "Rescue Auto" blazoned across the back window. Oh well. Whatever makes them feel good about themselves.

I've decided to invest in one of those portable battery chargers. Who knows, I just might end up someone else's unexpected, but very welcomed Knight-in-Shining-Armour.

Waiting for Boaz

For all you single ladies who are in such a hurry to find someone, here's a quick piece of biblical advice: Ruth patiently waited for her mate Boaz. While waiting on YOUR Boaz, don't settle for ANY of his relatives: Broke-az, Po-az, Lyin-az, Cheatin-az, Dumb-az, Cheap-az, Lockedup-az, Goodfornothin-az, Lazy-az or Married-az...and especially his 3rd Cousin Beatinyo-az!

-Bill Johnson

Ohana

#17

My maternal grandmother had 26 grandchildren. Almost all were able to gather this past weekend for our first ever "First Cousins" reunion. It was 3 days of activities designed to reconnect, reminisce, and most importantly - eat. It was the first time most of us had been together since Grannannie passed away a little over 2 years ago. We took the time to introduce our families and welcome my new sister-in-law. Thanks to our living overseas off-and-on for years, some hadn't seen my girls since they were babies. Most hadn't even met Isaiah.

But the love and laughter that enveloped us practically made up for lost time. They expressed more than just their love for the kids and me. They showed their support. Reassured me and rallied around me like a "Love Intervention". They reminded me of my special place not just in our Family, but in our World.

The love and laughter live on

Christmas in July

Well, not really. But a dose of winter weather would be welcome surprise right about now. We are in the middle of an oppressive heatwave that has kept the kids and me holed up daily until the sun goes down.

This picture was taken in early Spring of this year ~ when all I wished for was warmer temperatures.

All together now: be careful what you wish for.

Dirty Dancing

Now I had the time of my life.
And I never felt this way before.


This past Monday night, I boogied completely out of my comfort zone. Ladies' Night Out was ON and it promised to be a night to remember. My friend, Amy, suggested we all take her friend's new Pole Fitness class. Apparently, chair and pole dancing are going mainstream. They are considered a workout...as in exercise - something I am typically allergic to. But there was just something enticing about it. Like The Lambada. So that evening, seven sassy Mamas piled into two vehicles and we headed over to the studio. And you know what?

These Mamas got skillz.



I embraced my inner "Lola" (that's her smack dab in the middle wearing black) and actually broke a sweat. Beth and Carrie from Polar Fitness were excellent instructors. So patient and encouraging - I almost forgave them for their ridiculously incredible physiques. After two hours of getting our shake, shimmy, and spins on, the Sassy Seven emerged a lot more confident and a little bit sore. We loaded back up and headed out for a nightcap at Sonic. Could this night have gotten any better?

Turns out, sitting around eating greasy onion rings and sipping a Cherry Limeade (with extra cherry flavor!) in the company of great women does make things better. Sharing our faith, our trials, triumphs - stories of healing and restoration was a source of comfort for me (one mom's blended family of 10 was especially interesting to me). Sometimes I worry about losing my married friends after my divorce. I have been coupled for 19 years - married for 16 of those. I've never been single my entire adult life. Now, my relationships are going to be different. My lifestyle is going to be different.

Along with *ahem* exercise, I'm making better choices health-wise. Like drinking more water. Which is a big deal for me because if I had the choice of milk, water, or orange juice with my dinner, my preference - in this particular order - would be (1) orange juice (2) milk (with Hershey syrup added) (3) make a pitcher of Kool-Aid (4) run down to CVS for a ginger ale (5) call Mom and see if I can swing by her house for some cranberry juice (6) choke down the water. But "Fiji" water has changed the game. I could afford a trip to Fiji for the amount of money I spend on this brand, but the taste canNOT be beat.

And I am not just flossing after I eat pork chops. I'm flossing twice a day. Sometimes more (especially if I eat pork chops). Now I don't have to fib to the dental hygienist. My doctors are happy that I am eating. Been craving fresh fruits and vegetables, too. I need to gain - get up to a healthier weight. But they haven't explained to me how to get those pounds where I want them. If it involves a chair or a pole, though, count me in.

We Fall Down, But We Get Up

Separation. Anxiety.

By sharing My Story, I pray someone is inspired, touched, encouraged, comforted, filled with hope, and truly blessed. This isn't about "putting my business in the street" ~ it's about knowing you are not alone.


I walked into the office with an agenda. Little did I know just showing up for that appointment would save my life.

Savannah and I were meeting with her new pediatric therapist - the therapist who eventually referred Savannah to "The Team" for a full evaluation which led to her Asperger's Syndrome diagnosis. As the questions for Savannah wrapped up and the therapist's attention turned to me, I could feel dread slowly creeping up on me. As she lobbed all the obvious questions at me, I knew it would only be a matter of time before she'd hit on that one that would strike a nerve. And sure enough, it happened.

She excused Savannah to the waiting area and shut the door behind her. She handed me a box of Kleenex: Before we can deal with what's going on with Savannah, we need to deal with you. If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

That's when I let go. The Super Mom facade shattered. Before I could stop myself, I had let a stranger into my dark place of emotions - opening up about my crumbling marriage, the constant and total care of Isaiah, and Savannah's recent school and social issues. The trifecta that had pushed me to the edge. "You are overwhelmed. You are depressed. You need help.", she confirmed. I wanted to kiss her. Finally - validation. I am NOT crazy OR losing my mind. God had sent me an angel. He doesn't always boom answers into our ear. Sometimes He puts people in our path just when we need them most.

Thus began my coping. When dealing with depression and anxiety, research has shown that the best results are obtained through therapy plus medication. It's been a winning recipe for me, with a healthy and reverent dose of faith and prayer. I am healing. I am happier than ever leading the life God wants for me. It is an upward spiral through the depression, with every day a little better than the one before. Not that there haven't been setbacks. But I take comfort in knowing "this too shall pass". I am not alone. I thank God for my Support System, that seems ever-expanding. I am focusing on me. The gifts God has given me. The next chapter of my life.

There's hope. As long as there is breath in your body, you have hope. Things might not turn out exactly as you might expect them - very often they turn out better than you could ever imagine.

Believe.

Cause if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

Why I Kan't Kindle

I like books. Actual books. Nothing against e-readers, but there's just something about the weight of a book in my hands. Turning its paper pages.

Growing up in a home that valued reading, books weren't just decorations or props - like something in an Olan Mills photo studio circa 1976. Our very real bookshelves were bursting and we were always encouraged to "Go and sit down somewhere with a book".

I guess I'll be urging my children to "Go and sit down somewhere with a Nook".

"Ni Hao Dee-Jay"

Meet "DJ", the Chinese Dwarf Hamster and newest member of our menagerie.

Mariah fell in love at the pet store during a run on bedding and vitamin C drops for Angus. In many ways a hamster, especially an itty-bitty one, is a much easier pet than a guinea pig (except at night, as we would all soon discover...) After much discussion during a celebratory End-of-the-School-Year family dinner and promises that she would be the primary and responsible caregiver - we welcomed DJ into our family. And his 3-story townhouse.

We introduced DJ to Angus without much fanfare. They sniffed and twitched, but there would be no epic faceoff or smackdown. I think Angus was more impressed with Mariah's toy Zhu-Zhu Pet. Savannah has assumed care for Angus. And I mean she really cares for him. She feeds him by hand through through the cage bars and gives him daily attention and interaction. She shops for his treats and the other day she actually asked me if she could touch him. That is HUGE for my Asperger's child. She even trained him to stand on his hind legs. (America HAS got talent!)

We just have to help Isaiah discern the difference between DJ's exercise ball and his other toys. This, after Isaiah's hearty kick of DJ's exercise ball across the room while DJ was in it. Gooooooooooooooooooal! It's probably best to schedule the hamster's workouts after Zay's bedtime.

There is no need for an animal hoarding intervention for me at this point. But if I ever Blog from my backyard that the animals have staged a coup and won't let me back in the house, again, you will know - It. Is. Time.

Hair Raising Hosta

Last spring when I planted Patriotic Hosta in my front yard, I had no idea it was like catnip to deer. Imagine the look on my face the morning I expected it to be in full bloom only to discover it had been half chewed.

All summer, into fall, and covered in snow and ice through the winter - there it stayed. Forlorn and forgotten. I knew nothing of the species and had not idea if or when it would ever recover. And yet a few months ago - despite the mind-blowing, freakish heat and lack of rain - green leaves appeared again. I didn't hold my breath, but then the flower stems with lavender-colored buds began reaching towards the sky.

Now, this is the part of the story when the deer ruined it last year. Setting booby traps seemed a bit over the top, so I plucked some hair out of the girls' hair brush and sprinkled it around the flower bed.

It must have worked. Because almost overnight, this happened:

7th Wonder

Isaiah turned 7 today. Seven. And what a wonder he is.

When I Haven't Been Blogging...

...I've been playing with my kids. Not just "Uno" or Star Wars "Guess Who" - we're talking kickball. Volleyball. Sometimes in the same game.(In hindsight, the spontaneous match in heels after church Sunday against Mariah wasn't my brightest idea. But there's an app for that ~ called Tylenol). Even though two-thirds of the Brownies are still in school for another couple of weeks, we've gotten a jump start on Summer Goodness: basking in the warmth of the sunshine and the glow of fireflies.

I've picked up my camera and started taking pictures again. I never really stopped, but one day I realized just how much time had elapsed since I had even held the my camera. Photography brings me so much joy.

So do reading and writing. I've been a "reader" since I received my first Golden Look-Look Book. But I've recently rediscovered my first true love - with a vengeance. Currently on my nightstand: The Help, House Rules, and The Shack. I've already devoured Little Bee , but I keep it there. Well worth a re-read.

When I am able to tear myself away from the Best Sellers, I've been gardening and redecorating my house. I bought an indoor palm tree because it reminds me of my trips to Southern California and Gerber Daisies because they are so gosh darn cheerful. I'm vowing to keep the deer off of my hosta this year. It has finally rebounded from it's unauthorized "pruning" last spring.

And with the time I have left over, I've been learning how to be a joyful, appreciative, balanced, non-bitter Single Mom. It's not as easy as many parents I admire make it look. I salute you. It is absolutely not the same as being the Homefront Parent during times of deployments and other assignments that separate families - even though they helped pave the way. No, this is different. Not that all change is bad - I believe in God's promises - but it IS an adjustment.

Through it all, I continue to count my blessings. Every day brings me perspective and God's comfort. And that is definitely Blog-worthy.