Tuesday, March 16, 2010

The Blog of a Mad Black Woman

This is the part of the program when I am supposed to lose my religion. When I put my husband on blast. When I badmouth him AND his mama.

But I just can't --and not just because his mother was a saint. I can't because I said "Yes!" when he asked me to marry him. I can't because I chose him to be my children's father.

Am I disappointed in him? Totally. Am I angry at him? Absolutely. Would I love nothing more than to present him with the keys to a new Toyota Prius and a full tank of gas? Without a doubt.

I never thought I would be facing divorce in my late 30's. I never anticipated being a single mom of 3. I never anticipated being a single mom to a child with disabilities.

But instead of concentrating on what J did to me, I choose to be grateful for what he has done for me. I feel as though I am finally coming into my own. For the first time in my life, I know who I truly am. And I know what I truly want.

I never thought I would be facing a bright, new beginning in my late 30's. I never anticipated being an optimistic, blessed, single mom to 3 wonderful, well-adjusted children
.

And I never anticipated getting a second chance at happiness.

Thanks, James.

2 comments:

Bethann said...

You are a better woman than I.. Bless you :)

Sharon said...

He should still sleep with one eye open, though...;)